Last night Steve told me that what I do...or what I don't do...in the course of a day doesn't make a difference to him. In other words, our relationship and the harmony we experience as husband and wife and bestest friends does not depend on if the dishes are done, or if the laundry baskets are empty, or if I've made homemade Cheez-its with whole wheat flour, or if the kids have clean faces. Those things are all fine and good, but when it comes to his acceptance of me and love for me, they don't even remotely factor into the equation. At the end of a four-day work rotation, those were the words I needed to hear. In fact, I need to hear them every day, multiple times a day, over and over, so that my stubborn works-based flesh will fully grasp what it means to be loved and accepted regardless of my actions. (God knew exactly what he was doing when he put Steve and me together.)
God gives us familial relationships like husband/wife and parent/child to give us an everyday revelation into who he is. Scripture is full of this imagery. It's like a picture, a "snapshot from his camera,"* to help us understand our relationship with him.
When Steve, as my husband, is expressing his unconditional love for me, he is reminding me that our relationship is a symbol of the permanent, secure, unconditional relationship that I have with God through Christ...a relationship that is based on a covenant and not on my actions: "But when the goodness of and loving-kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy...." (Titus 3:4-5)
When I, as a parent, tell Harriet that I love her when she is sad or silly or happy or serious or mad or even naughty, I am laying a foundation for her to (I hope) understand the unconditional love that God has for her: "See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called the children of God; and so we are." (1 John 3:1)
When we offer the "blessing of belonging,"** to family members who have landed into a sticky situation or are struggling with the consequences of sin, we are emphasizing that "...nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord." (Romans 8:39)
When we relate to our spouses, our children, our parents, our siblings, our grandparents, our families in a grace-filled, loving, serving, faithful way we are pointing back to the God who is grace and love and faithfulness and who manifested his magnificent servanthood in the person of Jesus Christ. We are living out the results of the gospel in our lives and, in turn, are picturing the gospel - the good news - to those in our families.
*Thoughts to Make Your Heart Sing devotional by Sally Lloyd-Jones
** Oh, How Good It Is song by Keith and Kristyn Getty
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